Random words of wisdom.

You know, I'm 17. I have gathered much knowledge during that time. I have LOTS of interesting wisdom quotes, and I would like to share it with you. Unfortunately though, I don't jot them down. So yeah, I can't actually remember any of them. My bad. But don't worry, I won't disappoint you. I'll come up with one right now.

See how legit my advice is? Do you trust me now? Now my second advice to you is:

DO NOT EAT CHOCOALTE CHIPS OFF THE FLOOR

This is an important one! Do not eat chocolate chips off the floor. And I'm serious. I don't joke. In fact, I never joke. I know it's delicious and all, and you don't want it to go to waste, but seriously. To ground this piece of wisdom into you, I'm gonna repeat it again.


DO NOT eat chocolate chips...
or chocolate cookie crumbs...
or oreo crumbs...
or any other brownish/black looking thing off the floor.

I'll explain.

Say you're eating an especially awesome tasting Oreo. (Pfft..what am I saying? All Oreos are equally awesome.) Suddenly, the cookie drops and crumbs are all over the floor. Maybe it slipped from your hand, maybe a gust of wind came by and blew the cookie onto the floor, maybe you misjudged your biting strength and the oreo just flew away from the sheer force.

Well whatever the reason, crumbs are all over the place. It'd be such a mess to clean and you don't want to let the Oreos go to waste. What do you do? I'm thinking most of us would probably get down on the floor and start eating the crumbs, right?

I mean, the floor's clean. It's your own house dude.

So imagine yourself locating all the crumbs and picking up all the crumbs and eating all the crumbs. And you'd be like, 'Oh, there's another one...and another one...and another one...damn, how much did I drop?'

But here my friend, is where things can go horribly wrong. Look at what happens.

Yeah, I spell crumbzzzz with the z's. I'm just gangstah like that. 

Following the cookie trail like a treasure hunt

end of trial?

Apparently not.

Continuing the trial. 

See what I mean?

Now there are two groups of people in the world.

One group eats stuff that has fallen on the floor.

The other group says, 'Ewww, you eat stuff that has fallen on the floor?!'

Now, the first group can be further divided into sub-categories. One eats stuff that has fallen off the floor depending on where it has fallen. The other eats the stuff no matter where it lands. To this group, I salute you. Take a look at this chart to get a clearer picture.

Note: I'm sorry the picture couldn't go any larger. I was so bummed. It took me so long to do and then I just couldn't enlarge it. I tried scaling it and stuff but it just got all pixelated. Bummer. =(

So anyway, if you have superhuman eyesight, you can try looking at it. I have to warn you, it's lame.